The Wounded Healer

 

Challenges and Blessings and time to make some changes

Challenges and Blessings – time to make some changes

 

Yes, I know – it’s been a while since I wrote. Life has brought me challenges and many Blessings too. Rewind to the end of January when I was un-partnered and suddenly single. The Wounded Healer now has the perfect opportunity to take stock of her life, to make some long overdue changes.

The first life changing event was the decision to downsize and to move into a home that better suited my needs. A fresh start with no stagnant energy lingering in any corners. I had previously strongly resisted this idea, as I felt so attached to all my efforts that had created the tranquil space and beautiful garden. This time it was so different. I felt ready to find a space that was uniquely ‘me’, and would provide the perfect space for my Acupuncture Treatment Room / Sanctuary.

That decision turned out to be the easiest first step – the selling part took much longer. My determination to follow through was tested time and again. Months of weekly Open Homes followed and at times I felt so despondent that I was ready to quit. Somehow, I knew deep down that my new Home was waiting, and that I was to trust that all was indeed well.

And so it was. At the end of June my house finally sold, and on a most auspicious day in July I was declared the owner of my new home. It is perfect for me. Smaller yet spacious, with an established garden and a Sanctuary for my work. My happiness knows no bounds!

Then life became even more interesting. Three weeks after moving in, I fell while out running along the beach track. I remember walking home pleading with the Universe that nothing was broken! I had shattered my left shoulder joint, which required a bone graft, pinning and plating. Hmm. I did NOT see that coming.

In the weeks since then I have had time to reflect on so many areas of my life. Isn’t it amazing how such an event can bring us to reflect on what is meaningful, what serves us, and where we wish to focus our energy?

I feel a deep joy sitting here writing at my computer. It has been too long. I have much to share, and I realise that sharing is one of my passions. I am going to follow my passion more often. I hope you will join me.

How will you share your passion with your world? I would love you to share with me!

Share on Facebook

Changes – How Do We Deal With Them?

Dealing With Change Gracefully

Dealing With Change Gracefully

 

How does one navigate life changes gracefully?

I have come to ask myself this question after a particularly challenging 12 months. I had always assumed that my life would tick along quite nicely once I reached my fifties, and I am constantly amazed at how many challenges I continue to face.

Of course, we could be truly optimistic, and call these challenges ‘opportunities’ – opportunities for growth, for learning new things, for overcoming adversity. Forward movement also proves to us that we are alive, that we are capable of thought and action.

Life changes affect us in different ways. At the time, it may seem that we would never recover from the enormity of the event, our thoughts and feelings about what has transpired and how we were affected. With some time and space to reflect, there is always something lost, something gained.

When I left my previous job after 7 ½ years I could not imagine life outside of the confines of that institution. While I missed my close friends there, I soon came to value the diverse and broad thinking business community that makes up ‘the rest of the workers’. I ‘lost’ the security of a permanent position in a dead end job, yet gained the freedom to express myself and be valued for my work and aspirations.

My close relationships have not escaped the change cycles either. Perhaps we are more prepared for ages and stages related changes, yet sometimes those come sooner than expected. Dementia can rob us of years of communication with a close family member – it starts slowly yet transforms your loved one before your eyes. Younger family members may move in their own orbits, and over time those relationships also have the capacity to slide into nothingness if we don’t nurture and value them. People I thought would be with me forever are slipping away, consciously or unconsciously. Do you ever truly ‘lose’ those connections with Dear Ones?

People change. When large life events happen, we respond in our own unique ways. Sometimes this requires that we change perspective, we gain insight, we transform from the inside out. It is no surprise, then, that we may no longer ‘fit’ in our Love Relationships. That also happened to me. My partner and I separated. I ‘lost’ my best friend, my confidante, my lover. In turn, I ‘found’ my Inner Voice. I reconnected to my deepest beliefs and called on my inner reserves. I found that I really like Me.

Which brings me back to my original question – How does one navigate life changes  gracefully – especially when you feel lost, insecure, alone, sad or downright angry?

I realised that I needed to ask for help, something that was so difficult for me to acknowledge. I called on trusted friends for inspiration and guidance. I worked to maintain great physical health. And I worked with a coach to change my mind-set. I am still navigating monumental changes. I am also learning to dance gracefully through all the areas of my life. It is a work in progress, full of changes, and now it feels more expectantly pleasing than daunting.

Do you recognise similar themes happening in your experience?

Share on Facebook

Out Of The Box using Creative Thinking

Creative Thinking moves us out of the box we have become stuck in.

Move Out of the Box using Creative Thinking

Would you like to step Out of the Box you feel confined in?

I meet once a month, via a conference call, with a group of like-minded friends for The Creative Field Project which is:

  • A global network of people committed to the evolution of consciousness.
  • A field of collective awareness of the transforming, healing spirit of Love which is inherent to all people.
  • A context for engaging with other people in our individual awakening, learning and service.

The program is available to anyone, anywhere in the world, regardless of nationality, language, religion or culture. Small groups of about seven people meet monthly to assist with personal and collective breakthroughs that lead to new awareness and a new basis for service in the world. Groups meet in person, via phone or Skype.

At the end of November 2010 I was invited to participate in one such group. I accepted.

It changed my life!

Each month we are sent some material to consider before we meet. Each group has a Facilitator who hosts the meeting, and we are invited to follow a process to reflect on various aspects of the material and our individual responses.

Recently, a new approach was set in motion – we were invited to choose an area or dynamic in our lives where we wanted to effect changes, or shine some light on. We were to be spending four months working on a process which first identified the area/dynamic, then highlighted some creative action points to implement. This process has built in impetus, as once targeted, an action can be fine- tuned while being practiced.

There is great power in being held in a non-judgemental space while naming your fears and so-called failings. Each person in the group is witness to your challenges and shares joyfully in your triumphs. The collective energy grows stronger over time, and my fellow participants have become my chosen family, part of my chosen ‘tribe’.

For the third meeting in this particular cycle we were invited to view the dynamic that we had chosen to work with as if we were living in a closed box, with a limited pattern of thinking and feeling, relative to the circumstances of our life.

In order to transcend feeling stuck or limited, we were invited to think of the two most masterful people we knew (living or not) at a mental and emotional level, who could bring their clarity and focus to the situation to get you Out of the Box. Were there any necessary steps to take to implement these ideas or strategies?

Finally, we were invited to find five different approaches to the things that had been restricted, limited or stuck – approaches out of the box, out of the current mental and emotional context in which we had been functioning. These we would be sharing with our group.

What a valuable and interesting process!

I came away with more ideas than I thought possible, because they were presented from a place outside my usual standpoint, out of my usual box. This coming month will be rich with possibilities, and I so look forward to our next call together, to share in my group’s growth, humour and positive energy.

If you are interested in finding out more about The Creative Field, or would like to join a Small Group, click on the live link.

Expect to function Out of the Box you have been confined in!

 

Share on Facebook

Wanting to Live – Wanting to Die

quality of life helps reinforce wanting to live

Wanting to Live

Quality of Life is often taken for granted.

In the past few weeks I have had cause to stop and reflect on what it means to live, and die, well. Three separate recent instances have given me ample opportunity to ponder both wanting to live and wanting to die.

A younger friend triumphed at her third attempt to take her own life. I had not known her for very long, but in the short while that I did, she touched my life deeply and beautifully. We shared exchanges and experiences during a Spiritual Seminar and I remember looking deeply into her eyes and seeing her pure and beautiful essence looking back at me. I can’t imagine the inner turmoil that took her to the edges of her endurance, such that she could not see any other way out of her personal anguish – leaving her wanting to die.

How sad for those left behind: her husband, her family, her friends and work colleagues. Do they blame themselves for not being able to save her from herself? I hope not. They need love and support to celebrate and remember her beautiful soul and the love she brought during the time she was here with us. She was living life, yet choosing the peace of death for herself.

While working in a rest home, I had the real pleasure of meeting a middle aged man who was terminally ill. He told me of his recent exploits, his ‘bucket list’. He had admitted himself into the facility for palliative care, not in the city where he had lived for many years, as he did not want to burden his friends and acquaintances when he died. His estranged family lived overseas and he was matter of fact that they would not be visiting him. He told me about his spiritual beliefs, and that he was not afraid to die. He set about wanting to live his last days with the same enthusiasm that had brought him a very full and interesting life.

A colleague and I were the first two people to enter his room after he had ‘left’ his body. He was lying head propped on one hand, looking up to the ceiling with the clearest blue eyes. While my colleague went to report his ‘passing’ I had the opportunity to Bless him, thank him for allowing me to share some part of his Journey, and to wish him well on his continued Journey.

He had lived life at full tilt, and if he had any regrets he was philosophical that what had been was laid to rest. He died alone, yet touched the lives of each person who had a part in his final days. He lived fully in his body that was dying.

The third person is still living, yet wanting to die. He is elderly, had been a very fit and healthy husband and father – then suffered a severe stroke which left his body ‘half useless’. He says if the results of the stroke can’t be cured, he wants to die. He sees no way forwards if he can’t do all the things he used to do and has to rely on his wife and son to help him with the most basic life skills.

He is living death. He wakes every morning, hating the fact that he has woken. He goes to sleep at night wishing he would not wake. His family are at a loss – what to do? Why won’t he help himself?

In the end, quality of life seems to be the common thread. No matter what our circumstances are, when we feel nurtured and fulfilled we believe that life is truly worth living.

Do you agree? Please share and comment – I value your thoughts about wanting to live and wanting to die.

Share on Facebook

Want To Change Everything? – Ho’oponopono

 

Ho’oponopono Changes Everything

Ho'oponopono MantraI recently attended a four day seminar that was literally a life changer for me. Based on the soon-to-be-released book Becoming a Sun, the author David Karchere was also the main facilitator of the seminar. More of that in a later post, though.

 

For now, I am still really focused on the experiential work we did using the ancient Hawaiian practice of reconciliation and forgivenessHo’oponopono.

The Hawaiian Dictionary defines the practice of Ho’oponopono as mental cleansing: family conferences in which relationships were set right through prayer, discussion, confession, repentance, and mutual restitution and forgiveness.

The practice of Ho’oponopono is a tool for atonement, it corrects errors, restores and maintains good relationships among family members, erases the effects of past actions and memories that cause havoc and grief in our lives and the lives of others – by getting to the causes and sources of trouble.

The practice is so simple and the results so profound!

The four step Ho’oponopono process invokes the powerful forces of Repentance, Forgiveness, Gratitude and Love.

Step 1: Repentance – I am Sorry

    • This statement opens the door to atonement.  The moment you take responsibility for any negative manifestation you experience or witness you also create an opportunity for healing. 
    • The apology is an acknowledgement that we are sorry for whatever it is that we (or our ancestors before us) have done to cause the adverse circumstance to take place.

Step 2: Ask Forgiveness – Please Forgive Me

    • We ask for forgiveness with the absolute certainty that it has already been granted. 

Step 3: Gratitude – Thank You

    • Whatever your petition or concern, the moment you take responsibility for its occurrence and seek a way out–you are guaranteed a response.
    • Your “thank you” is the acknowledgement that your petition has been heard and acted upon.

Step 4: Love – I Love You

    • Love is a great healing power that reverberates through your psyche and generates an immediate feeling of well-being.
    • Say I LOVE YOU. Say it to your body, say it to God / The Powerful All That Is. Say I LOVE YOU to the air you breathe, to the house that shelters you. Say I LOVE YOU to your challenges. Say it over and over. Mean it. Feel it. There is nothing as powerful as Love.

The author Dr Joe Vitale heard about a Psychologist in Hawaii, Dr. Ihaleakala Hew Len, who cured a complete ward of criminally insane patients – without ever seeing any of them, by using Ho’oponopono. When asked how he accomplished this, he explained “I just kept saying, ‘I’m sorry’ and ‘I love you’ over and over again”.

Joe Vitale went on to write a book with Dr Len, Zero Limits, in which Dr Len states:

“We are all responsible for everything that we see in our world. By taking full personal responsibility and then healing the wounded places within ourselves, we can literally heal ourselves and our world. Whenever a place for healing presents itself in your life, open to the place where the hurt resides within you. After identifying this place, with as much feeling as you can, say the below four statements:

  • I am sorry
  • Please forgive me
  • I love you
  • Thank you”

“Blame is far easier than total responsibility, but as I spoke with Dr Len, I began to realize that healing for him and in Ho’oponopono means loving yourself. If you want to improve your life, you have to heal your life. If you want to cure anyone – even a mentally ill criminal – you do it by healing you.

Turns out that loving yourself is the greatest way to improve yourself, and as you improve yourself, you improve your world.

Suffice it to say that whenever you want to improve anything in your life, there’s only one place to look: inside you. And when you look, do it with love.” – Joe Vitale.

I am truly grateful for learning about this process, and for all the opportunities where I shall be able to practice it.

Are you also ready to love yourself?

Are you ready to improve your world?

If you have found this post inspiring or helpful, please re post and share!

(References:     http://www.thereisaway.org ;      http://www.wanttoknow.info;   http://www.laughteronlineuniversity.com;   Wikipedia)

 

Share on Facebook

What MakesYou Feel All Right?

 

 

Do you feel All Right?

It is Okay to Feel the Way you Feel

It is All Right to express ourselves

A pack of coloured IT’S ALL RIGHT postcards landed on my work desk a while ago, and I love the way I feel when I flip through them.

I have them spread out in front of me now, as I write, fanned like a Tarot spread. Each has a phrase that reflects current thoughts and feelings generated by Cantabrians since our world turned topsy turvy in the aftermath of the numerous Christchurch earthquakes.

So much has changed – buildings, landscapes and most of all, people. We all have something to offer, hence the birth of All Right?

What is All Right?

  • It is a social marketing campaign designed to help us think about our mental health and well being
  • It’s about helping people realise that they’re not alone, encouraging them to connect with others, and supporting them to boost their well being
  • It is about ensuring well being is at the heart of our recovery

Who is behind All Right?

All Right? is a Healthy Christchurch project that is being led by the Mental Health Foundation and the Canterbury District Health Board, helped and supported by the Ministry of Health, the Ministry of Social Development and SKIP, and the Canterbury Earthquake Recovery Authority.

The ALL RIGHT postcards have a statement on the front, and  some suggestions on the back to help us generate ideas on how we can respond to the feelings we have named. Today, these are the ones that ‘speak to me’, telling me it is ALL RIGHT to feel the way I do!

IT’S ALL RIGHT TO FEEL OVERWHELMED SOME DAYS

Everyone has good days, and then others that are more challenging. At times it can be hard to deal with all the challenges that come our way. When feeling overwhelmed, know that it’s all right, and remember to build on what is going well, and release the things that are holding you back.

Think of something you have always wanted to learn or do, and feel all right to give it a go. Learning new things is a proven way to help us feel good. Commit to doing something active once a week with a friend or family member. Go for a walk, a run or a bike ride and be kind to your body.

What are the things YOU could do to feel All Right, when it all feels a bit much?

 

Wondrous Moments transport us

It is All Right to get caught up in a wondrous moment

Taking time to notice helps us to feel All is Right in our World

It’s All Right to get caught up in a wondrous moment

 

Moment of Wonder

Each moment promises to be a Moment of Wonder

IT’S ALL RIGHT TO FEEL LUCKY

Our hope for our future is vital for the recovery of our city, and for ourselves. How can we instill the feeling that it’s all right to feel positive? How can we become more actively involved in the things that excite us?

By giving something to someone else, no matter how small, we can help to restore their optimism. We could volunteer our time and energy. This also helps us to make a real difference and connect with new people, which is all right too.

What things could you do to give something back, without concern for the rewards?

While we are feeling in a positive place, we could be encouraged to consider who else could also benefit from us feeling All Right. We could check on our friends and neighbours and offer to lend a hand in small ways. Everyone appreciates a little help, and giving to others makes us feel good too.

Practice mindfulness – sit quietly in a busy place and notice the people, sounds and smells that remind us to savour the moment and reflect on All that is Right in our world.

What things can YOU do to share the Good Stuff that you are feeling?

For more information and ideas visit: www.allright.org.nz

Share on Facebook